I admit this time around I have felt much less of a connection to the baby with this pregnancy. With Kylyn I felt so in tuned with her. I loved her from the start! With this one I didnt feel that way. I realized I was pregnant obviously, and I was excited, and overjoyed to be having another baby! I just didnt feel 'connected' to the baby in the way I was with Kylyn.
Could it have to do with the VERY different situations to which these babies were concieved, and then born and will be born into? -Possibly Could it be that I REALLY was hoping for a boy? - Maybe...
We had our 20 week ultrasound/anatomy scan, and found the gender to be a girl,...(I love it though) She is healthy, with no problems able to be seen by ultrasound, or by blood test. *BIG sigh of relief*
Well, while feeling so disconnected to this little girl growing everyday inside of me, I decided to take a nice hot bath one night. Just to relax my achy mucels and calm down so I could sleep well...I was so relaxed haha I could have fallen asleep in the tub no problem!
Suddenly a bottle of shampoo plopped into the tub making a loud thump on the tub bottom. Just then I looked down at my tummy, and not only felt the baby move, which I have been feeling now for quite awhile, but I SAW her move...ugh! I felt totally different in that moment. I fell madly in love! I missed that feeling, that sight...it has been over 2yrs since I have experienced it with Kylyn!
Ugh I just laid there, and purposely made sounds to watch in wonder as my baby moved around in reaction to the sound. It was all together wonderful. I fell asleep as usual that night, with my hand on my belly, and I drempt of my daughter inside, and I loved her. I feel MUCH better about this connection problem I was feeling, and am happy to be able to use the word WAS in the sentance.
I am now overly excited to meet this little girl. :)
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